Feed on


It started out as a seemingly harmless pain in the nape/ neck area.  Being a migraneur for more than two-thirds of my life, I simply dismiss it as another episode which, if turning out to be unbearable will just be pacified by one of my life’s BFFs, Flanax. In a couple of days however, the pain had spread to my shoulder blades and down to the middle of my back.  At first I thought it was related to my Coke (soda, not cocaine) withdrawal – been trying to get “sober” from Coca Cola for the past 20 years – and surprised even myself that I have finally gone on four straight days without it.  References online (LOL) warned me of headaches, dizziness, mood swings and mental fogginess (which worried me most), so I dismissed that initial slight pain in the neck/ nape area as just one of those withdrawal symptoms.

As I was already set to see my cardiologist last week (I was scheduled for my check up in April, actually), I told her about my nape pains, and touching the problem areas she said she needed to refer me to rehab med.

Never in a million years did I imagine I will say (or post a status) stating: “I’m in rehab.”

But hey, wonders never cease.  Turning 40 in a couple of years, I guess my life is just about to begin.  So ok, I’m in rehab. Physical therapy and rehabilitative med, but “rehab” nonetheless.

And then it hit me, that this rehab thing came at a point in my life when I had altogether decided to go easy on my Coke intake.  For the first time since elementary, I finally found the courage (and the sense?) to go for days without it.  I used to be in shock whenever my lab results come out each time we have an annual medical exam at work, and my blood sugar remained within normal limits (I always get the feeling my blood samples have been switched).  Given my intake of soda since I was younger I wouldn’t be surprised, but for some reason my body chem has so far been really, really weird.  Take for example the muscle relaxant given for my pains last week.  Doc warned that I should take it after dinner because I’ll get really drowsy or dizzy afterwards.  After drinking it the first time and the  night thereafter I was awake till about 1:30 in the morning.  Weirdness.

So, rehab.  I’m liking the sound of it.  I’m liking the way you roll the word in your lips and tongue.  I love it in so many levels because it speaks of hope; of doing, being something better; of welcoming change.  They say we learn from our mistakes if we aren’t too busy denying them.  I am now set for 6 sessions of physical therapy at 50 minutes each of solitude, soft music and electrodes.  50 minutes with nowhere to go, but just to be still, (hopefully) to NOT think or worry about anything while in the process, and just be.  Rehab is love.


Leave a Reply